Interview with an Un-churched Friend

Interview with an Un-churched Friend

(Ryan)

(1) What are a few issues or topics that impact/interest you?

            I'm interested in any topic that stretches my knowledge and potentiates new perspective on social issues, philosophical concepts, and human consciousness as a whole. Issues such as politics, progressive science, music, sports, spiritual ideas...that about covers it.

(2) What are some issues or topics that you think people in your community/people your age are interested in?

            I think most people in this area have a pretty simple mindset about life. They're in no way less intelligent than, say the community of Los Angeles, but they see little purpose in pursuing ideas that are outside of religion, family, and working. Rather than making advances to impact the world, they're more reactive to what goes on around them.

(3) What kind of family-friendly event would you be interested in attending in your community? 

            I think a cook out at a local park is always a great way to attract the public. If I saw an advertisement for a free church BBQ at a park nearby, I’d totally grab lunch and have some conversation. Plus it's an all ages environment.

(4) Why do you think most people don’t attend church?

            I think most people don’t attend church because they've been given a very bad impression of church at a young age, or they simply were never able to truly find Christianity as what they believe to be absolute truth at whatever stage of life they tampered with the thought.

(5) If you were to look for a church to attend, what kind of things would you look for?        

            I'd look for really down to earth people, and a very welcoming, almost overly accepting attitude. A pastor with extreme integrity is a must, and that's easy to know pretty quickly.

(6) What advice can you give to pastors who really want to be helpful to people?

            I would tell pastors to simply practice what you preach. If you're a pastor, you should be the living example of what a Christian lifestyle should look like. You've accepted the Great Commission in a radical way, and should live life accordingly. Of course, all Christians will sin and need forgiveness, but pastors should hopefully only "stumble" in areas that are widely more socially acceptable.

(7) Have there been any specific reasons that you have not attended a church personally?

            I haven't attended church for the past couple years, except for holidays and special occasions with my family, simply because I don't believe that Christianity is the belief system for me. I have very different ideas about the purpose of existence than Christians. I don't believe in the Christian “God.” I believe that Christianity is a great pathway to happiness and security for many who need it, just not for me.

(8) Have there been any Christians in your life who have admired? Why or why not?

             I admire the pastor of the church I grew up in. He is very easy to talk to and has a welcoming personality. It’s easy to tell that he really cares about people.

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            By reading the above comments, it is not hard to tell that Ryan is a very intelligent, socially aware, personable young man who knows the Christian lingo. He grew up heavily involved in church his whole life, many times in the spotlight of numerous ministries and groups. His parents were involved in church leadership, his siblings just as involved as him. Around age 14, Ryan started to slip away from the church. First by backing off and stepping down from ministries, then a few years later, discontinuing his attendance altogether.

             It was really hard to interview Ryan. Maybe because it’s painful to watch my little brother live without the hope that I have, and maybe because he’s so hardened that he barely lets anything personal slip out. Probably both.

            Ryan is so great. He’s one of those people you could talk to for hours and be entertained; one of those guys who loves the spotlight and will do anything to make you laugh. Ryan is a great debater, an even better actor, and an excellent judge of character. Within five minutes of meeting someone, he can discern the level of his or her sincerity. With all of these traits and talents, it’s no wonder that Ryan doesn’t like church.

            Why? Ryan has witnessed too many fake, insincere, acting, hypocritical Christians throughout his life. He’s seen people teach him something and then get caught for some sort of secret-sin. He’s been exhorted to live righteously and be involved in ministry without being discipled. He’s been assumed to be a Christian because of his family, but not actually ever really asked about his own faith walk. He feels like he was forced to be a fake.

            Ryan also knows many real, sincere Christians, but his negative experiences have overshadowed them. I think that this poses a challenge for the Church. First, the challenge is to live open, honest lives that reflect who we really are, not who we’re pretending to be. I don’t mean to let ourselves go, stop resisting the human nature, and stop trying to live righteously, but to be open about our failures and faults so that people can know that they are just like us and can experience the life-changing power of Jesus in their lives too. Secondly, the challenge is to treat people with enough respect to not make assumptions, but to sincerely get to know them and where they are.

            I’m still praying for Ryan to find Jesus in a real way, for himself. I try to be as real with him as possible, and I try not to tell him what to do or that the choices he’s making are wrong, because in his mind, they’re not. That’s really hard, but I think he respects it. I pray that my life and the changes my parents have made because of this will somehow, someday, show him that we believe what we say; that Christianity is not just a crutch. Sometimes when I think about what’s happened to Ryan, I get so angry. I wish that I could have kept all of that from happening to him. I wish that he had had people pouring into his life like I did. I wish that Christians would actually live like what they say they are. I get so angry, because I know I’m one of the worst. I know that he watched me lead worship and then come home and disrespect my parents; lie straight to his face. What regret. How can I fix it? How can I show him the Light that has disclosed the cobwebs that were suffocating those parts of my heart that were not submitted to God’s will? How do I show him the love that he’s so desperately searching for?

            Questions. 

Interview of a New Believer

Interview of a New Believer

(Francesca)

(1) Tell me about your journey to faith in Christ.
            It's been a journey filled with immense, horrible lows (which I'm certain is close to what hell feels like) and the most amazing moments of my entire existence. There is such a difference from being a Christian because you go to church and have a label and prayed a prayer one time to being a born again of the Holy Spirit, walking in His will and having a daily relationship with Him and the Word.

(2) What helped you the most to step over the line and make the commitment?             Giving up my sexuality. My whole life spent in church was spent with God nudging at me to give it up to Him. I wouldn't. I refused. And the more I got closer to giving it up to Him, the more I would get closer to Him. But ultimately for years I refused because I liked my identity in my sexuality and I liked loving and lusting for those of the same sex. When I saw a demon, I was suddenly scared of not following God anymore. On top of that, forgiveness was a huge part of this. I refused to forgive several people, namely my mother, who I hadn't spoken to in over a year...when I forgave her, the gates of Heaven were loosed and I could see clearly. Then God asked, "Will you give up your sexuality now?" And I said, "Yes! Take it!" and now I am fully committed to Him. I no longer just pretend.

(3) What do you think is the biggest obstacle that is keeping those who are lost from coming to Jesus?

            Obstacles like New Age lies, worldly propaganda, world religions, "being a good person theology," lust, pride, selfishness, sexuality, and hatred of authority. Mostly I think it's just human nature.

(4) What has been the best part of becoming a Christ follower for you?

            Hearing Jesus' answers to my prayers, getting His answers, The Holy Spirit, Worship, Fellowship with other real believers, Evangelizing, and experiencing/witnessing supernatural events.

(5) What has been the most challenging part of following Christ?

            At first it was combating the demonic forces, since I stupidly invited them into my body to help me commit suicide in rebellion to God. Initially I realized I had four, but I had many of them who remained "silent" for some time until God revealed to me how He wanted me to deal with them. I thought fighting them was hard at first, but after realizing what the full armor of God means and how to combat them and test spirits through the Word, then it got a lot easier. Now I am struggling to battle human nature, which I find equally hard, if not harder.

(6) What do you think is helping you grow the most in your faith?

            The Word Himself, The kindness from other born again believers who encourage me and pray for me, and trials and temptations. James 1 has been kind of like my theme-chapter.

(7) What advice do you have for me in helping others like you to grow in their faith?

            Just love. No matter what their sin is, just love them and guide them to Scripture. Be ready to explain the Bible in layman's terms and pray. Prayer works, as well as speaking and declaring in the name of Jesus. Prayer shows you have faith that God will work in someone's life. Mostly just love them because love never fails.

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            By reading the answers above, it is evident that Francesca has been through a lot in her life. She has dabbled in many different religions, theories, theologies, lifestyles, spiritual powers, and drugs. Francesca was a part of my youth group in our junior high and high school years. I watched as she experimented with different things, and listened as she poured out all of her concerns and theories about them. There were times when my friends or I would walk into the church bathroom to find her doing drugs or attempting to harm herself. All of this while attending church on Sunday mornings, girls small groups on Wednesday evenings, and youth services on Sunday nights. What was church not offering her?

            Francesca never tried to convince us that she was okay. She never pretended to believe what we believed. She tried out Christianity once, but didn’t experience the heart change and gave up. Now, approximately 7 months ago, Francesca has experienced that change. I can honestly say, I’ve never seen such a transformation in someone’s life. Francesca is completely different person.

            I think that the most beneficial thing I’ve learned from talking with Francesca and through her answers to these interview questions is that it’s ultimately God who changes people. It’s not a program or an event or a relationship that changes a heart, but it’s the working of the Holy Spirit. Another thing is the importance of consistency. For Francesca, the church body was her cushion to fall back on. After she had spent herself on one of her experiments, she would always come back. She knew that the friends and relationships and leaders she had at church would never forget about her, would continue to pray for her, to encourage her, to question her, to challenge her.  She also knew that the people at church had something real- that they had experienced the Lord in their lives, even if she didn’t want to accept it for herself yet.

            

Class Project: Small Group

Give 20 hours during the semester to leading a Small Group. Your class posting of 300 words on your blog should report and reflect upon your experience. Reflect on what you accomplished, disappointments and difficulties along the way, and lessons learned.

            Throughout the course of this semester, I have been the leader of a small group within my youth ministry. My small group is comprised of high school junior and seniors who are interested in learning about leadership and are willing to serve.

            I started advertising for the group in mid-August, just at the brink of the new school year. A sign-up sheet was posted, and seven out of thirty students signed up to be a part. I was very excited as I prepared my schedules and outlines for our sessions.  By the time the week rolled around for our first session (September 2^nd), three students had backed out. I tried not to be disappointed, but I was a little bit. By the final count, there were two girls, two boys, and a junior leader in his freshman year of college in the group.

            Our sessions have been comprised of a number of different activities, including group prayer, practical devotions focused on the condition of the heart, leadership, and leadership qualities in the Bible; scheduling and planning events; discussion about the condition/needs/wants of the youth group; and exploring and developing the students’ own leadership qualities through preaching/teaching, leading worship, leading small groups, and servant hood.

            I thought that preparing for each week wouldn’t be as hard as it has been. I’ve found that it’s really hard to prepare a mini-lesson that is full of questions and discussion-worthy material each week. It’s also been hard to devote enough time to each student, being that I’m a student myself with many scholastic responsibilities. To be honest, most times I’ve prepared the lesson, but only start the outlines for events and teaching schedules during the 1.25 hour trip there on Sunday afternoons and just “wing” the rest of the discussions.

            God has been gracious to me, because even though I don’t have nearly enough time to devote to this group, let alone the youth group as a whole, good things have been happening. Just last week, one of the shyest girls from my small group shared a sermon she had prepared from her heart for her piers in the youth group. We worked on it a few times after youth group, or before small group, or via telephone and Facebook messaging over the past month, and by the night of her message, she was ready to go! She did a phenomenal job, didn’t let her nerves get to her, and the students responded very well. The look of satisfaction on her face when she was finished was worth it all for me.

            One thing that was disappointing was, one of the guys had expressed a desire to lead worship weekly. I was working with him on things like auditions, scheduling, song selection, etc., and he was doing very well. About six weeks in, he started shirking his responsibilities. At first I thought that it was okay because he was making sure he had people to cover for him, but as the weeks continued, so did his irresponsibility. He decided that the job was too much work and that he’d rather just play guitar and sing back-up than have to put in the extra work. For me, this was really hard to swallow, because that had been my favorite job when I was in youth group, and I know from experience how little work it really is. It was hard for me not to try to convince him with my personal testimony of how beneficial and foundational the experience would be for him and that I thought he was just being lazy. I didn’t do that, but we did work out a schedule in which he leads once a month.

            To sum it all up, it’s been a challenging experience filled with excitement, laughter, disappointment, struggles, and everything in between. The group will continue and I will continue to be stretched. 

Jon Decker

            Jon Decker was raised a pastor’s kid.  His experience of church growing up was in a small, “uber-pentecostal” church in Gap, PA where he saw and heard a lot of things that left him questioning; things like seemingly scheduled public tongues and interpretation, ten-minute-long worship choruses, etc. His many questions and reservations continued to lack suitable answers, so Jon eventually slipped away from, first the church, and then the faith.

            A few years later, Jon rediscovered the hope found in the Lord and dedicated his life to ministering to others in ways that are straightforward and do not cause unanswerable questions.

            Today, Jon is the Creative Pastor at Journey Church, Phoenixville. They meet in a classic movie theatre right in the heart of the town. Yes, meeting in movie theatres has become somewhat of a trend, but Journey’s meeting in this specific theatre is significant.  Jon says that at Journey, they want to be a culture of givers, not takers. Unfortunately, people these days aren’t used to Christians treating them with respect. Journey has changed that in Phoenixville. Instead of looking for cheap deals or ways to work the system, Journey goes above and beyond to bless those who they are renting from. Jon says that it is vital for you to bless and honor those who you are working with.

            Journey Church’s kids’ ministry (ages 3-12) meets across the street at a nightclub. Every Sunday morning, the kids’ pastor Taylor, his wife and his few volunteers deep clean the club before the children arrive. After the day’s activities, they do it all again, leaving the building far better than they found it. This is another example of being good stewards of your relationships and treating people and their things with respect.

            For Journey Church, everything is outreach. Sunday experiences are geared toward the “un-churched,” starting with a “giant army of greeters” when you first walk in, VIP treatment for first-time guests, and every sermon/service ending with an invitation to follow Christ.    

Jon says there’s no “XYZ” or formula to “doing church,” but staying focused on both the people in your doors and those still out on the street.

            Journey Church has been accused of being a “seeker friendly,” because of their rock-concert style worship, simple preaching, and fashion-forward attire.  Jon’s response to this is that, yes, they want to be “seeker friendly” in that they want to be inviting and relevant to the community in which they live, but that that does not have an influence on their style of music or clothing. The worship style is heavier because that’s what the music director enjoys, and the outfits are trendy because they’re trendy people! The only reason the preaching might be viewed that was is because they treat every Sunday as though it’s the first time anyone’s been to church. They leave nothing unexplained and don’t get into too many controversial topics from the pulpit. If people want to talk about those, they can talk about them over coffee.

Journey’s core values:

-To be a church of givers, not takers.

-To never miss a chance to celebrate (Party in heaven=Party on earth).

-To be competitive.

-To worship: All we are for all He is. Excellence.

I think that I’d like to check out this church sometime and see what it’s all about for myself.